SANTA CLAUS QUOTES II

quotations about Santa Claus

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Santa ... is a man with a harsh and stringent code. Santa makes lists of children throughout the world and, oh no, he puts them in categories according to their behavior. His ledger has two columns: one for the good and the other for the bad (the "naughty" and "nice"). He gives toys and candy to the well-behaved children, but he doesn't forget the bad kids, no, he puts lumps of coal in their Christmas stockings. He believes in accountability, but is generous of heart and of a forgiving nature. Last year can be forgotten if you were good this year.... Santa likely wouldn't go in for participation awards and scoreless soccer games for the kids. No, he believes in real outcomes, even in rewards and punishments. So dare we say it: Santa is a conservative.

FRANK MINITER

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Just think about it: Santa Claus is an imaginary figure who lives in the North Pole with no visible means of support. He is a 300 pound man who is supposed to be able to descend through a narrow chimney flue with a sack of toys on his back as a reward to good boys and girls. Someone has noted that Santa Claus flies in a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer led by Rudolph with his nasal nightlight. At least Santa has fairly nonpolluting transportation.

WILLIAM H. GODDARD

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Santa only comes to those who believe. He doesn't care if you believe in him or not, and he's not trying to make anyone believe who doesn't believe. If you don't believe, he just skips your house.

JENN-ANNE

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Parents, make sure the kids aren't reading over your shoulder because it looks like we're about to have a blue Christmas: Santa Claus is dead. Archeologists said Wednesday that they might have discovered the ancient tomb belonging to the original Santa Claus, otherwise known as St. Nick, beneath a church in southern Turkey, according to The Washington Post.

HERB SCRIBNER

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No doubt about it, Santa is old fashioned. He is also an individualist. He goes his own way. He doesn't obey airport tower controllers or customs officials.

FRANK MINITER

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We all ought to understand we're on our own. Believing in Santa Claus doesn't do kids any harm for a few years but it isn't smart for them to continue waiting all their lives for him to come down the chimney with something wonderful. Santa Claus and God are cousins.

ANDY ROONEY

Tags: Andy Rooney

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The real Santa Claus is at the mall.

LEMONY SNICKET

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So Santa Claus is bogus but Grim Reapers are the genuine article. What does that say about the world?

MINDEE ARNETT

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Santa Claus is more than a mythical figure, living in the North Pole with reindeer and happy industrious elves. The commercialization of Christmas, exacerbated by things like the obnoxious Elf on the Shelf and hissy fits over the colors and patterns of Starbucks cups, are symptoms of a culture missing the meaning and purpose of the season. The real Santa is completely in line with celebrating an authentic Christian Christmas. Modern pop culture has turned Santa into a figure almost completely removed from his origins, and it's time to go back to the beginning and remember the real Saint Nick.

HOLLY SCHEER

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Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit people only once a year.

VICTOR BORGE

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But Santa Claus himself would not have approved this speech. He brought toys to the children because they were little and helpless, and because he loved them. He knew that the best of children were sometimes naughty, and that the naughty ones were often good. It is the way with children, the world over, and he would not have changed their natures had he possessed the power to do so.

L. FRANK BAUM

Tags: L. Frank Baum

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Of course Santa is dead, you force a guy to eat a billion cookies in one night, what do you think is going to happen?

JIMMY KIMMEL

Tags: Jimmy Kimmel

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I think Santa Claus is, by and large, quite beneficial, for when the child is finally allowed -- or forced -- to recognize the nonexistence of Santa Claus, then the child is able to go through the vital intellectual process of reconstructing reality in light of new evidence, complete with back-forming new stories to account for past events. This prepares the child for many other disillusionments and gives her vital and well-supported experience in maintaining her grip on reality independent of the stories told to her at any given time.

ORSON SCOTT CARD

Tags: Orson Scott Card

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We half-eat cookies and drink the milk, we leave notes, all so kids will believe in something that isn't true. Kids try their best to scientifically determine whether Santa's real and our whole culture feeds them false evidence. We dupe them.

THOMM QUACKENBUSH

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Under a welfare state there is always the danger that adults as well as children will believe in Santa Claus.

EVAN ESAR

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Though I adore the idea of Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, Sandman, the Tooth Fairy, and such luminary characters--especially their altruism and devotion--I still don't believe in them. For I know the truth. Only one such miracle worker exists who performs magic in my life, seeing to my wants and needs without fail. That queen is my mother. With unwavering faith I believe in her.

RICHELLE E. GOODRICH

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She felt that it was not the responsibility of the educational system to make sure that by the age of twelve, a student has a clear enough understanding of reality to be able to figure out that Santa Claus is a myth.

BRUCE GAUTHIER

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Just one Santa delivery team? How could there be? There are 526,403,012 children, all expecting presents before tomorrow morning. So, that's 22 million children per hour. It's impossible. Obviously, I got a second sled.

STEVEN MOFFAT

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Ho, ho, ho
Santa's comin' back, around
So get ready
Christmastime is my favorite part of the year
'Cause ah, there's a lot of love in the air
And holiday cheer

TODDIEFUNK

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God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.

BIL KEANE

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